The New Relic
by NightAngelo'0
Summary: [Oneshot] If you want to get somebody into another world, how would you do it? There are many methods, and here's one of them. AU!Negima!verse. OC!Naruto.


**Disclaimer:** I do not own any thing that belongs to the Naruto and the Negima franchise.

**A/N:** I don't know what I was thinking when I wrote this. But this is my first go at writing a story, so here it goes. *Fingers cross*

**Warning**: Readers are to be aware for absurdities, spelling errors, misuses of tenses, misinformation and total ass-pulls. Enjoy.

* * *

º*º – Scene change

*bang* / *blush* – Special effects

"I'm talking here." – People's speech by regular talking

'I wonder?' – People's personal thought to the current event

–What? = The extra bits to give a little more flavor

== Name == Spotlight on that character

* * *

**"Hello new life!"**

* * *

- Somewhere in one of the deserts of Asia -

Like how all great stories should, this one starts with a bang.

*Boom!*

On the field of sand, a litter of skin and machinery splatter upon the sudden made crater.

–Ouch.

"Okay I'll admit. That did hurt," a disembodied voice declared.

Using a language never before heard in this world.

Also, of course it will hurt, he did crash onto the world with a might of a falling star. Even with high pain tolerance, that will still hurt like hell.

The scatter remains set off ablaze. The floating ashes merge and form a human shaped figure. Since the original vessel got blown into bit and pieces, this will be his new body.

Somehow, his indestructible white mask – with a fox pattern – was still fastened onto his face, concealing the main source of his power.

–What does it take to destroy this mask!

"Man, it feels great to move again."

With a bit of stretching, the man rattles his limbs, his original human-flesh limbs with mechanical insides. Being sealed away is always a pain, and in this particular overpowered seal, he couldn't move a muscle and was force to stay awake during his whole imprisonment.

Speaking of his muscle, there was a nice breeze tonight.

Why does this comment matter?

Well here's the thing, although he and his comrade-in-arm have great regenerative abilities, the man's clothes do not.

–Put some clothes on!

Since there was very little reason to stay in his birthday suit – outside in the open field – any more than necessary. The mechanical masked man quickly uses a bit of his energy – known as **chakra** – to reconstruct his clothes and protect his expose reanimated flesh.

He won't ever die by being in his bare skin, but the scorching heat or biting chills can still annoy him to a certain degree.

*Kiki!*

'Oh right, forgot about you for a moment.'

Looking around, his comrade/weapon was nowhere in sight.

–Time to use one of his other sensory abilities.

Diverting more of his chakra to where he needed it, a single white eye appears on the back of each of his hand, highlighting the veins around it, and scanning his surroundings.

–...? Well that's interesting.

'There's no chakra in the air?' the masked man noticed.

Now that he's paying more attention, the air around him gave a very different feel to the air he was accustomed to, there's something in the air, something more spiritual.

No matter, he can still use it to fuel him if needed.

–Hm?

'There's a person coming,' he noted. 'It looks like… a child?'

Another thing worthed noting was that there was no chakra coils in the young boy's body, but a different kind of internal matrix.

'The energy inside his body, it is the same as the one in air.'

But denser and more noticeable.

The blond shook his head. "I'm wasting time."

'I'll wonder about this later, I still need to look for **Samehada**.'

With his task in mind, he scans for the familiar signature.

"…There you are," he said unintentionally, switching off the extra chakra to his hands.

Once the eyes closed and vanished into his skin like it was never there, the man makes his way to a certain spot and then plunges his fist into the sand. Once he caught what he was looking, he ripped it out of the ground with one swoop.

In his hand held his comrade and weapon, the Samehada

It has the appearance of a giant thumb with blue scales covering its body, it is a weapon that processes a sentient mind, it has no eyes yet it can observe its surroundings, and finally it has great big white teethes.

Very sharp teethes as the masked man would attest. Why? Because it had curled and was now the biting the hell out of his head.

"Ack– Hey Samehada, quit it," the man yelled out. "I know you are still mad, but get off!"

However it ignores him and keeps on the assault.

Both are aware that a new presence – the kid from before – had just arrive, and is now watching them from a distance. They could meet the kid, but the two are busy doing something at the moment, something like beating up one another.

*Crunch*crunch*crunch*

A figurative cross appears at the back of the man's spiky hair.

"I said get off!" he shouted and punched his weapon. His hand shows no sign of being damage despite smashing it against an object made of razor sharp scales.

Samehada flew one or two feet into the air before landing on its yellow handle, the very one that has a small skull attachment at the end.

*Kikiki–i!* (You are a worst wielder I ever had!)

It growled at him.

"Calm down, I know you are–"

–Wait, he perfectly understood that?

'Did Samehada just talk to me? Actually talk to me?'

He need to test this, makes sure that it's not a onetime fluke, because he already knew that Samehada had always insults him whenever it gets.

"Hey, say something again."

–Hm.

'What did I just say?'

Those words were not the ones he normally used in the Elemental Nations.

*Ke? Kukii–ke?* (Huh? Since when can you speak my language?)

–Whoa!

'Yes, I can totally understand that!' he shouted to himself. 'I don't know the actual words coming out, but I can hear what it means.'

This is great, because from all their time together, the masked man had just assumed what his weapon was saying to him.

–Hold on, you're saying that all those clicking noises Samehada makes, they were actually used as a real language?

"Just now recently."

*Ke? Kikuukikikokiiku–* (Really? Good, now I can properly yell at you about all the pain you given me you f–)

–Urgh.

This rant is going to take a while.

'Heh, a lot did happen huh?'

The duo has certainly been through a lot. Apparently, even as a minor discarded fragment of the original soul, he still gain the notorious ability to make the worst of any situation. He gains all the bad and very few of the good. At least he keeps the two signature moves, because they embodied the very soul of **Naruto Uzumaki**. Strangely enough, one would figured as a Naruto, he would be addicted to ramen and using his renowned verbal tic.

Well it doesn't matter.

He's not going to force it. If he doesn't have it then he doesn't have it. This would however make him a **fake-Naruto**.

== Fake-Naruto ==

Now back to his angry mouthy comrade/weapon thing.

–Oh, nice timing.

Apparantly, Samehada had just finished its rant.

"I know," fake-Naruto signed. "But again, how could I have known that trying to summon a dead person would instead get the **Shinigami** breathing down my neck?"

–Really? Who would've figured?

º*º

- Elemental Nation; Land of fire; Konoha -

A long time ago – maybe a century or two – within somewhere in one of the multi-verse.

–...What?

There was a young hero – still in his mid-20s – that had just died and left for the world beyond. He was happy with his life. He saved the world, succeeded his life time goal, got married to a person he genuinely loves and had a child to carry on his legacy. Although he did wished that he could've stayed with his loved ones a little longer, the young hero was satisfied knowing that he had lived a life without regrets.

This was Naruto Uzumaki, the **Child of Prophesy** and the savior of the Elemental Nations.

His corpse was left behind for his most trusted friend to dispose. His body to be burn and his ashes to be cast to the wind, symbolizing that he will always be around. To be one with the earth and sky, to become the saving wind, a helping aid to the fellow residents of their world.

Well that would've been the plan.

If it hasn't been for a certain multi-dimensional traveling, thieving, not-fully-right-in-the-head, loony God.

The insane God came out of nowhere and stole the corpse when the hero had just passed away. Then as quickly as the intruder came, he quickly vanished with the body and proceeded to his lab in another dimension.

–Again, what?

º*º

- A lab in another dimension -

Once there, he reanimated the body using whatever part of the soul that still remained, inserting attachment like an eye and a mouth on each of the body's hand, performing insane experiment that messes with the code of the universe to give it immortal life and changing its biology.

Along with the memories, ability, and skill of one of the most powerful character ever conceived in the multi-verse. The insane God will craft the perfect weapon to finally brings forth his fantasy.

He can finally bring death to the being whom could-not-be killed, to slay the specific God that no sane enough person would risk earning his ire.

Due note however that the hero's soul had already departed, and most of his memory had already left the body. All that remained were pretty much only the bad memories that were discarded. So it can be anyone's guess on how the memory of 'being poked in the ass by a scarecrow' can be used to kill somebody.

However before the mad working of the insane God had even gone past 24 hours, trespassers started barging their way into his domain. As luck would have it, it was the very person the insane God wished death upon, and worse, the Godly person brought someone – that looked like the younger version of the hero – along with him.

For reason unknown, the insane God quickly send the zombie-made-machine to the world the body originally came from, he tried to escape as well but he got caught, and the last thing the fake Naruto heard was a cry of a little child.

–Strange. There were no children there, so whose voice was that?

º*º

- Somewhere in the Elemental Nation -

== Fake-Naruto ==

Fake-Naruto never did see the insane God again, he doesn't know whatever happened to him, but he can't really do anything about it.

It was such a shame that he didn't at least finish using the code to fully charge his chakra coil. So unless he spend some time to manually charge up his internal coil, he will only have enough to "safe fully" produce about five shadow clones worth daily.

–That's still a lot mind you.

Although he was crafted to re-spawned when dead, so he could probably screw around with a loophole somehow. The code had tied him to the word of death, so as long as death is needed in the world, he can't permanently disappear.

With nothing else to do and very little memory of whomever he was, Fake-Naruto tried his best to deal with his new daily life, he learned about his abilities, from his travels he obtained many weapons along with a sentient one called Samehada, and he also encountered an over-sized talking fox with rabbit-like ears that always seek to kill him for some reason.

After they first met, Fake-Naruto had to fight against the nine tail fox on multiple occasions. The loud male voice of the fox had roared out its reason for wishing his demise, it was something about how it had been after the culprit of a crime from a few centuries ago, and now it will destroy the impostor for desecrating the body of the person the hateful beast had ever considers a friend.

From all their many duels to the death, which the blond didn't agree to, the results varied to anyones' win. Sometime the victory had gone to Fake-Naruto, where he then ran off and leaved his weakened foe, and sometime to the fox, which mean Fake-Naruto have had his body destroyed again and again.

Those had been fun times. Most of his day pretty much went by the same way.

Until one day, he did something stupid.

The wandering survivor was walking around and minding his own business. He got bored and so he then figured he could try to learn a new move. Once he considered his options, he went for bringing a renowned person back to life to learn from.

–What could possibly go wrong?

Unfortunately, the Shinigami intercepted the call and when it first laid eyes on the man, it got really pissed off.

It turned out that Gods are territorial, and the Shinigami didn't appreciate having another symbolic God of death – especially a fake one – in its domain.

Actually, that was just one of the reasons.

The other reason was having someone messing with its work. For some reason, the Shinigami started ranting off about a guy name Kishi-something, and how because of him, there was a mass resurrection of souls across this world and parallel dimension of it, and how it was messing up its lifetime work. It even tried to condense its workload by adding solid clones of itself, but it still couldn't put a dent on the growing mountain of paperwork.

Fake-Naruto tried to leave while the Shinigami was babbling on about its problems, but the authorized 'God of death' just keeps reappearing right next to him, and what's worse, it constantly tried to rip out the his soul. After bringing out Samehada, there was then a long epic battle between the two immortal titans.

Right until the Shinigami pulled a cheap shot.

–When you can't defeat something, seal it.

Using a strange new move, the masked man and his living weapon got sealed into a constructed prison, made of unusual energy they had never seen before, and then blasted them off beyond the sky.

After circling the world for who-knows-how-many years, the duo went crazy, and then after they were bored of that, they started to learn. Once they finally cracked the strange formula, they tried to absorb the energy – that was like chakra, but not chakra – in order to prepare their escape. But then they accidentally tore a hole in space and punch through the sudden rift, sending them on a trippy journey across time and dimension.

–Hope that rip in space doesn't cause any problems for that universe.

They smashed through some sort of veil and overloaded some sort of invoking seal placed around the new world.

Whatever it was, it did something to their mind.

The back story then finishes with them smashing face first onto the desert sand.

–Well there you go, that's his back story of what happen.

º*º

- ? -

== Fake-Naruto ==

Back at the new world, Samehada was still angry at him.

*Ke—i*

Samehada growled at him, somehow puffs of steams were leaking out of the living weapon. Fake-Naruto can sense its intention that promises pain.

"Don't even try it," he stated, stepping into a battle stance that even though it had so many openings, it serves him well in many conflict. When one doesn't need to worry about death, one can try to practice and perfect the more risky tactics.

It can still hurt though.

Before anything can happen, a new voice intervenes.

"Hey you!"

–Hm?

It was in a different language but it sounded like a kid's voice.

"Hold it right there you clickety-click alien invaders!"

–Oh right, the observer from before.

'I wonder when he was going to make his move,' Fake-Naruto sighed.

Pinpointing the voice, the blond looks to the sky and finally met face to face – or a mask to face – with their child observer.

A boy of around ten years of age, red hair, and has a very arrogant grin on him. He was standing obnoxiously on some sort of wooden staff with his arms crossed.

"Yo– I don't know what you two visitors came here for," the kid boldly spoke. "But if it's an invasion, then get ready for a beating of a lifetime!"

*…*

"…"

"Oi– What? You both stunned silent by my greatness?" the kid asked with a strained grin, he can feel some sweat dripping down the back of his neck.

*Silence~*

"Oi– Say something," he started to plead. "Come on, I feel like an idiot here."

It seems the silent stares were getting to him.

*Kukii–ke?* (Is he serious?)

'I think he is serious,' Fake-Naruto chuckled. "Well aren't you a funny one."

The duo then watches as the kid *face faulted*. Amazingly enough, the loud kid was able to keep his feet onto his staff despite the angle he was leaning at. However, something did catch Fake-Naruto's notice, Samehada's speaking language still stays the same.

"Oh come on! That long pause of silent and that's the first thing you said?!" the redhead mouth off. "No back talk, no asking for– wait you can speak English?!"

"English? Is that what this language is?" Fake-Naruto asked, looking to Samehada.

–Hm?

Due note that the words he uses had gone back to the clickety-click noises. It seems this ability is depended on his desire to speak.

*ke? kikuukii–ke?* (What? Why are you asking me for?)

'Samehada can't seem to change the language that it speaks,' noting this mystery. 'But I can.'

Any more thought on this was put on hold when a kid calls to them again.

"Oi– Are you both by any chance from **Mundus Magicus**?"

–Hm?

Two words from that sentence were a different language.

"Mundus Magicus?" the masked blond repeated the words. '…Magic World?'

*Ke? Kukikikuu–ke* (Magic? It that what this is?)

Samehada snickered. *Kiikiiki* (It doesn't taste half bad.)

–It's eating it?

Back to the boy, he seems to be waiting for their answer.

"No," Fake-Naruto answered the boy. "We are not from this Mundus Magicus place."

For some reason, the red head seem dejected that they weren't. Then he quickly got over it, and was back to his grinning face.

"Well if you are not from Mundus Magicus, then you must be alien invaders!"

'What's with that unreasonable logic?' Fake-Naruto *sweat-dropped*.

"You both should consider yourself lucky," The redhead boasted. "You both can be known as the first two stepping stones for a future legend."

The kid's energy – magic – output started rising up like crazy.

"I'm **Nagi Springfield**, and I'm going to be the true **Magister Magi**!"

– _Déjà vu_.

Behind his mask, Fake-Naruto felt a pull of a smile desiring to show.

"…Amusing."

º*º

- ? -

Deep inside an inner world, rooted onto the side a mountain which had shown no limit to its height, laid a ruined temple of wood and stone, and preserved in a radiant light. Beyond the range of the illuminating shine, the outer areas were concealed in the expansive length of forestry and shadows.

After the long centuries of slumber, the dweller of the sanctuary had finally awoken.

He was dressed in a black shirt and pants, along with a white overcoat, and a matrix of orange lines marked all over his body.

Exiting his resting chamber, he crosses the wooden bridge that stands over a large pond – where the two large shadows of a Koi fish endlessly swims in – and into the fire viewing room.

"Well Boss, you didn't expected this outcome," the robed man commented with a vulpine grin.

On his face exhibits three black marking onto each of his cheek. A metal guard – bearing the symbol of the leaf – affix onto his forehead, his blond hair spikes up to where two endmost locks resemble the appearance of horns.

In the middle of the room, a lighter sparked and spawned an enormous rainbow colored flame, the fire burn brilliantly within the colossal bowl, large enough that it can fit a person.

The man stares into the flickering motion of the dancing flame. Each of his eyes shows ripples and tomoe patterns over a red sclerae and irides.

A running of moving-images displays within the viewing flames.

The current scene playing within the fire shows a masked man, a living shark weapon and a red headed brat meeting a certain blond vampire.

"I look forward to the day when you arrive –ttebayo."

ºENDº

* * *

**A/N: **Well that's it. I feel like there was a lot more saying than showing here. Heck, the only scene I was proud of was the last bit. I also have no idea whether this is a OC or an alternate Naruto. Oh well, please do tell me what you all think of this fiction, as well as how to improve as a writer, I would really appreciate it. Later.


End file.
